Part 2- And I Love You So
by Carebearmaxi
Summary: Picking up the next morning after Donna takes Harvey back to her place for a little platonic companionship after Stemple walks out with Harvey's duck painting, Harvey wonders if they should take their relationship to the next level.
1. Chapter 1

And I Love You So...

Chapter 2- The Next Morning

I watch her sleep. Her beautiful red hair in a beautiful tangle around her peaceful face. If only I could tell her how much she really means to me. I feel too much for her ever to let us become involved. My track record is so bad. How does she know exactly what I need? It was so nice having someone with whom to eat and doze before the TV.

Donna's eyes slowly opened and she says to me, "Good morning, Harvey. Did you sleep well?"

"Yes. I haven't slept that heavily since...I can't remember when I ever slept that deeply."

"Feeling better?" she asks as she sits up gathering the blanket around herself. We're both fully dressed. I in my T-shirt and pajama pants I picked up last night on the way here and she in her tank top and pajama pants. Her black tank top strap slips a little from her shoulder as she leans on one elbow looking up at me with those beautiful dark green eyes. It reveals more of her porcelain skin and hint of a breast. A sudden memory of a night many years ago when I saw her completely naked as I left in the middle of the night. She is so beautiful and only gotten more beautiful as the years have gone by. I know we didn't have sex last night, but I want to tease her to show I am feeling better and because that is a part of us.

"Donna, what happened last night? We didn't...?

Donna rises and gives me a hard look.

"Harvey, if we had had sex last night for only the second time, you would have remembered it."

"Whew...," I said and then I sit up and draw the blankets around me as I half sit and half lie in this wonderfully comfortable bed.

"Thanks a lot. Geez, why do I bother?" Donna asks to the ceiling.

"Because you love me, that's why," I joke back.

Donna smiles and my whole world is suddenly brighter. I scoot all the way down in her bed and throw the covers up to my shoulder. Donna looks down at me with quizzical look.

"Are you feeling better?" She repeats.

"Yes. Thank you."

She turns away from looking at me and then decides to lie down again herself. I suddenly can't remember what day it is. I start to get out of bed panicking and I feel a restraining hand placed on my elbow.

"Hey, good looking, where are you going on a Saturday at 7:30 am?"

I smile and I tease back.

"I know I'm good looking...didn't realize it was Saturday."

"I know. You've been so preoccupied with Mike and getting the firm back on its feet.."

"You have, too," I acknowledge.

"I know I have. But we all promised that night that we would give our total heart, soul and blood remaking our firm. You just been wearing your guilt for Mike so heavily that you almost stopped functioning altogether. I don't want you to give up, but if you have exhausted all the avenues with which to help, you'll have to face that Mike might have to serve his whole sentence."

I do not want to argue with her, and I know she's right. So I move to her side of the bed and place a kiss on her cheek. She still smells like French Vanilla with a touch of cinnamon which I know came from the pancakes we decided to have last night because the shitty Thai place was closed. I lean back and we both smile silently knowing how much we really need each other and how much we really love each other.

"So, if you want to take a shower, I think I still have an old pair of sweat pants I borrowed from you one night the last time I got sick at your place. There is also a spare T-shirt which should fit as well."

"How do you come to have T-shirts that would fit me?" I ask wondering if the T-shirt is Mitchell's. She hasn't mentioned him in weeks and I have never seen him, so I am not sure he is still in the picture. Like she said, she, too, has been working hard to recycle the firm, so I don't even know if she has had a personal life since Mike's trial.

"I told you I borrowed it from you when I was sick the last time at your place," she says. I just can't remember how long ago that was.

"Remember the office Christmas party about two years ago? Right before I performed my major faux pas with Liberty Rail?"

"Oh," I said with the memory suddenly filling my mind. "You were upset because the guy you were dating stood you up and you got sick when you mixed your drinks on little or no food. I remember. I had Ray drive us both back to my place to make sure you didn't die on me in the middle of the night."

"Yes. I tried to assure you I wasn't going to drown in my own vomit like a junkie rock star, but you gave me no choice. I think I fainted or passed out."

"You did. Luckily I caught you or you would have hit your head on your own desk, if I remember," I say smilingly while I look into those beautiful eyes of hers.

"My hero," she says dramatically with a hand to her chest.

We laugh at the memory and the silliness of it. We need more of that. We need more levity and laughter between us. It's hard because I feel so to blame for Mike being in jail and I know what Donna says is true but I can't help it. Every time I look at Rachel's sad brown eyes I can't help feeling it's all my fault why she's alone

"It's ok, Harvey. Really," Donna strokes my damaged ego one more time.

Donna decides to rise. She turns away from me so I see her straight back and curvaceous ass which I try to calm my hormones from wanting to reach out and pinch her. There can't be any of _that_ between us because I am so afraid that I will only screw up what we have. I can't drive her away again. This time I know it would be for good, so it is better to show nothing at all and hopefully she can accept that is all I can give her in fear of losing her.

"Earth to Harvey," I hear her say. Geez, did my brain go down that path again? I do love her _in that way_ , and I do want her so much.

"I'm sorry, Donna. What?"

"I just wanted to say that I will go make some coffee and give you a little privacy if you want to shower. You now know where everything is , right?"

"Yes, since I've been here more than just that God-awful dinner party and that-other time."

I see her smirk a little when I mention that _other_ time. Suddenly I want to do nothing but grab her and make love to her right now. In truth I don't think I ever felt as one with anyone as I do with her. However, I hesitate knowing that if I capitulate I will only hurt her in the end and she will leave me for good.

"Ok, I'll see you when you're out of the shower," she says and turns and walks out of the bedroom.

I lie in her bed, still feeling her lingering body warmth and unforgettable scent in her sheets, not wanting to get up right away, and I wonder if I just made another life altering mistake.


	2. Chapter 2

Two Months after the Next Morning

Harvey hit his fist with his other hand disgustedly. He knew he should never have trusted Sean Cahill. Sean never gave a damn about Mike except to give him the ammunition to put William Sutter in prison. _Well, there has to be some other way to spring Mike and put Sutter in prison. Unfortunately, now I am tied to freeing this man because that's what the reason I was hired and what is expected of me._

Harvey swiftly looked at his watch.

"Donna?" He asks as he ventures out of his office and still see her sitting at her desk typing away.

"Yes, Harvey," Donna asks knowing perfectly well what he is about to ask her.

"Why are you still here? You didn't have to type those motions until tomorrow," Harvey asks. It had been weeks since she had stayed late to do some work.

"I just thought that now was as good as ever. Besides I know you need them by the end of week. No big deal. Are you heading out?"

"In a minute, I take it you heard what went down between me and Cahill?"

"Yes. Is there still a way to cut another deal?"

"I don't know. That's why I need to come back. Now I have to build a defense for Sutter that son of a bitch to the best of my ability if only to stick it to Cahill."

"Well, if there's another way, you'll think of it."

"I'm going to try like hell that's for sure." Harvey said positively but behind his eyes he hid his doubt and fear from his favorite redhead.

" Funny, I was really looking forward to Mike's coming home. I miss him," Donna mentioned quietly.

"I do, too. The only reason I see him now is to discuss his deal and how to keep Gallo from killing him. That reminds me, you'd better file that motion for his parole hearing before Gallo gets the word that it hasn't been done yet.

"I'm only glad to know Rachel took on her own project. It's been giving her a lot to do rather than sit and wait around for two years for Mike to be free. I'm also glad to see Rachel not as trusting of Cahill as she may have been. Although she was hoping against all hope that this would work she realized Cahill's priority to Mike's deal was not to free him but to put Sutter behind bars for his own recompense.

"She's learning," Harvey stated. As he looked at Donna he suddenly remembered that night a couple of months ago when she came to him to comfort him after the loss of his special painting. Harvey knew that Donna would not have remained working had she had signficant plans. Apparently she had still been seeing Mitchell because although she had not mentioned it, Donna's demeanor had been caring as always but eager to leave as soon as 6:00 pm came. Harvey was truly happy for her when he saw her in this light. He was not naive, either, he knew he still loved her and would have loved to have a relationship with her now; but he realized it was too late. Better for her, he thought.

Harvey turned around to go back to his office when Donna called him out again.

"I thought you were going out and then coming back. You haven't left yet," Donna observed still sitting at her computer typing away.

"I changed my mind." Then he turned around anyway. He came to lean over Donna's cubicle.

"Is everything ok?"

Donna turned from her computer and looked up into Harvey's face. Just like him sometimes she could erect a wall. She never wanted anyone especially herself to question how she was feeling. Donna was a big girl. She knew she was awesome and she was here to help not normally accept help only in times of great peril like she had been with Liberty Rail.

"Sure, Harvey. Why do you ask?" Donna took a finger and brushed a chunk of hair from her face.

"Because you haven't stayed here after hours with me for a long time now. Lately you've been stacking my desk with what I need and then give me a rundown of what I need to know and then you're 'see ya later, Harvey' and out the door you run on those heels. What's up?"

Donna shrugged and then she turned away from Harvey by swiveling her chair toward the other wall. _I can't tell him. He doesn't need to know. He'll just laugh it off and tell me Mitchell was a fool anyway. I'm beginning to think the only fool in that relationship was me._

"Come on, Donna. Come clean, right now. Tell me," Harvey said as he came to her chair and swiveled her back to face him.

"Donna, you've been crying," Harvey said. He could never bear to see her tears. To know she suffered even a little tore his heart out.

"Come on, Donna, tell me. Has this Mitchell guy hurt you?" Harvey asked beginning to fume that anyone would hurt Donna.

"How did you know it was Mitchell?" Donna asked raising her eyes to Harvey wondering how he knew her so well.

"Come on, Donna. I know you like you know me. Number one he's the last guy I know that you were seeing. Number two you've worn that dress three times in the last two weeks. The only thing that throws off your fashion game is a guy. I know this time it isn't me, so I deduced it had to be that Mitchell guy. What did he do to you? Because if he so much as harmed a hair on your head I will make up a suit and throw him in jail!"

"Harvey!" Donna placed her hands on top of his it lay on her desk. His other hand gripped the back of her chair. "It's not his fault. I broke up with him, but it doesn't mean that my heart still isn't broken."

"He made you choose between him and me, didn't he?" Harvey reasoned aloud a little less harshly.

Donna, at first, shook her head vehemently. Then she looked into Harvey's large brown sympathetic eyes and nodded yes.

He crouched down before her chair and placed a comforting hand on her knee.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Donna laughed for just a second. "Sounds like Dr. Agard or me has rubbed off on you. Since when have you ever wanted to share your feelings?" Donna asked as she patted the hand on her knee.

"Hey, I learned a lot in therapy last year. I learned..."

"That life doesn't revolve around the great Harvey Specter?" Donna asked looking at him with raised eyebrows.

Harvey smiled and lowered his head. He then raised it and laughed a little. "As a matter of fact, I did."

Rising off his heels, he turned Donna around and said, "Shut off that computer. You and I are having a drink."

"Harvey, I just want to go home."

"Ok, we'll have a drink at your apartment or at my condo or at a bar. Choose."

Donna looked at her computer clock and noted it was way past nine. "How about your place? I want to check on my cactus."

"Oh, you mean Bob?"

"You named it, Bob?"

"Yes. He's awfully good company, Bob. He doesn't butt in when I'm trying to work and ask me to share my feelings."

"Then you've rubbed off on him because I trained him to get you to talk," Donna said and smiled. Her smile immediately brightened Harvey's heart. He loved to see her smile.

Harvey returned to his office for just a second to grab his suit jacket and Donna grabbed her sweater. It was early September and although not chilly the air was definitely pointing toward Autumn.

"Ready?" Harvey asked.

"Yes, I am. I didn't call Ray," Donna said. She instinctively knew sometimes when Harvey was preparing to leave the office but since the firm went downhill and Mike's imprisonment Harvey had been a little more unpredictable or she had not been paying attention.

"That's ok. I drove the Mustang today. It's in the parking garage."

"Oooo, am I supposed to swoon now?" Donna asked flirtatiously.

"Of course because every woman swoons for a sharp dressed man driving a Mustang," Harvey said sarcastically back and laughed. She was still smiling and that was all Harvey hoped for as they made their way to his car.

Donna watched as Harvey sped through the late night city in his Mustang. She still thought as she always had. He was the most handsome man she had ever met. She realized once again the main reason why she broke up with Mitchell. He simply was not Harvey. Although Harvey never asked to move in with her, Donna imagined a life with him. It was so much easier than picturing a life with Mitchell. Mitchell was a great guy. Donna really, really had liked him, but he was not nor ever would be Harvey. Donna knew Harvey loved her, but how did he love her? That was always the question where Donna's head and heart always returned. She knew she could never fully commit to another man, even if he was not Harvey, unless she knew exactly how Harvey loved her.

They had not had a lot of emotional conversations in the last few weeks due to the devastation of the firm and it rebuilding plus Harvey was working so diligently in finding a way out of prison for Mike. Of course, just when it looked like Cahill was putting through the deal which would reunite Mike with his family Cahill reneged stating it was his superiors. Poor Harvey! She knew how guilty he felt for allowing Mike to take Anita Gibbs' deal but the man has not slept properly for weeks nor has he returned to his womanizing ways. He had not focused on the rebuilding of the firm if it could not be combined with getting Mike out of the slammer. As Donna eyed him from her seat next to him, her heart was filled with her love for this man. Perhaps, she was the only one who knew who he really was inside. Complicated for sure but of man of deep, caring emotion.

Harvey looked over at his riding companion and with a sideways grin asked "What are you looking at?"

"You," Donna stated succinctly.

"Did I grow three heads since we've been driving in the car?"

"No. I was just thinking how hard you're still working on getting MIke out of prison. I don't want you to have a heart attack and die on me. That wouldn't do any of us any good."

"Donna," Harvey whined. "I'm not going to have a heart attack." Then in a more quiet almost inaudible voice, he said, "since you came back to me, I have never felt better." He turned away from her then because he was embarrassed by the emotion behind that one statement.

Donna lowered her head. She had heard what he said. He still loved her as she still loved him. However, was he in love with her as she knew was with him or was it because she was his only support system?

She realized that Harvey's place was just around the next corner. The late night air breezed in through the open car window and moved her hair causing her to raise her head and take a swift deep breath trying so not to anticiate anything beyond the nightcap they were to share. As she watched their approach to the large illuminated edifice, she allowed her imagination one glimpse of returning to this place as her home and Harvey as her mate. That was so much easier to picture than a life with Mitchell in her smaller apartment.

It occurred to Donna why she chose his place when given the choice. She used the cactus as an excuse. Donna was touched that he actually had named it. Maybe Donna chose Harvey's place because of the recent happenings with Mitchell. She had not expected to be in this position again. It was not that she was stringing Mitchell along it was just that if she had had more time loving Mitchell, he would usurp Harvey from her heart completely. However, as Mitchell had stated to her as he had left Donna's apartment the other night, if she was not willing to get away from Harvey physically, how was she to know she could love wholly elsewhere?

"Donna, we're here," Harvey stated as he unclicked her seatbelt for her. "Let's go have that drink."

"Sure, Harvey. Thank you." Donna saw the kindness in Harvey's deep dark eyes. She could drown in those eyes and a sudden memory of a mere 18 months ago when he told her he loved her suddenly arose. Another memory flash of further back inhibited her mind when she saw those eyes so full of passion and lust and focused only on her as they closed the door and he pinned her against the wall of her apartment with a breathless kiss. Before more memories of tender lovemaking and fierce passionate sex could break Donna's heart again, she heard Harvey's voice.

"Donna," Harvey beckoned while holding his hand out to help her alight from the vehicle. The sudden bursts of memory of that other time exited Donna's head as quickly as Harvey's hand helped her from the car.

Their hands touched and at the spark she knew he felt as well as she they both looked at each other and smiled again much like the smile they shared that other morning two months ago, fully dressed, as they both lay in her comfortable fluffy bed.

Harvey tucked her hand under his arm and momentarily massaged her fingers with his own asking, "So, do you still want that Scotch"?


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Remember italics are Harvey and Donna's thoughts in the moment. I hope I did this justice for how I pictured it and how I pictured them. Please R &R if you feel so inclined - Carol**

The Next Morning - Part 4

Donna woke up in Harvey's bed. She was fully dressed in her pajamas. _At least I think these are my pajamas. Oh my, that's Harvey's arm! How drunk did I get last night? The last thing I remember is that I was in the bathroom and Harvey said he had a pair of pajamas that might fit me. These aren't women's pajamas there Harvey's. Oh dear I don't have the bottoms on. Oh, he has the bottoms on. What the hell happened last night...?_

"Good morning, Donna," Harvey said as he turned over and examined his beautiful red head secretary/friend lying next to him.

"Harvey, what happened?"

"Well, we were having that Scotch and we were pigging out on leftovers I had from that shitty Thai place and you got sick. You mean you don't remember?"

Donna lie on her back with her head turned toward Harvey and said, "I remember going into the bathroom and joking with you not to sneak up on me in the shower."

"Yeah, well, you didn't smell like I wanted to jump your bones. I knew you were in no condition to go home, so I determined that you needed to stay and threw you the pajamas. You proceeded to throw the bottoms back out of the bathroom and stated in no-nonsense voice that women did not need to wear bottoms of men's pajamas. I said ok and laid them on the end of the bed and here they are," Harvey said as he pulled at the fabric which covered his legs.

"I assume we didn't have sex last night."

"Well, as tempting as you are, even after getting sick all over yourself, I reminded myself of your rule and took a cold shower."

"So what happened?"

"You passed out on the bed. I just tucked you in and got in beside you. I was a complete gentlemen. However, you really shouldn't drink so much when you're depressed. It made you snore," Harvey said chuckling out of the side of his mouth.

"No, I do not snore. At least that's what others have said," Donna said turning away from Harvey and gathering the plush quilt closer to her chest. _It smells just like that wonderful cologne and his own Harvey scent. It always makes me feel safe. Just like Harvey. Damn it, Harvey. Why have you ruined me for any other man who wants me? Like Mitchell._

"Donna?"

"Yes, Harvey," Donna said trying not to be depressed again. Again she knew she was the one to break it off with Mitchell, it still did not mean it did not hurt.

"You, ok?" Harvey had gotten out of bed and came around the other side to look at her. _She cried and cried last night. No wonder she was so sick. Why did you break up with Mitchell? It was me. You never came out and said it, but I know it was me. You told me you loved me. Do you remember that?_

"Yes, sure, I'm Donna. Of course, I'm all right. I'm fabulous," Donna said wiping a tear away. "I'm even fabulous with last night's make up smeared all over me."

"You're beautiful," Harvey said in a soft voice and experimentally placed a hand on her blanketed hip.

"What do you remember from last night?" Harvey asked coming closer.

"I don't remember much of anything. Did I go on a crying jag last night? My eyes feel puffy and I am so tired," Donna said hoping she had not said anything too revealing.

"Oh, yeah, you cried your eyes out. Then you told me you loved me and then you proceeded to throw up all over you and me ."

Donna buried her head under the covers to hide her embarrassment.

"You can send me the dry cleaning bill," she said in muffled tones from under the thick quilt. Still from under the blankets, she had told Harvey that she was glad he had had an extra toothbrush for her to use because morning breath would be bad enough but to put it on top of vomit breath would have been very disgusting.

"You would have slept on the couch had that happened," Harvey joked and then coming experimentally closer to her kissed her lips quickly.

Silently they stared at one another briefly, she stared at him with shock and then smiled. He, in return, answered her smile with his and then dove in for another kiss. Donna opened her arms and took Harvey into them. He, in return, took her in his arms and came to lie on top of her.

 _Oh my God! Harvey, what is happening between us? No one has ever kissed me like you have. I love you so much._

 _I love you, Donna. Don't you know that by now? It was always the how, wasn't it? Well if my kiss doesn't answer that question then you're not as smart as I thought you were._

Their kiss became deeper. Donna rolled Harvey on his back and she straddled his waist. She was flush with fever for him and could feel the enlargening of her breasts as Harvey hands had cupped each one and massaged them. She quickly undid the buttons of the pajama top to feel his bare hands on her bared breasts. Harvey rose and kissed her again removing the pajama top as he did.

 _Oh my beautiful lady, "_ I want you, Donna. I have always wanted you," Harvey said between hot kisses and Donna's response of nibbling his ear and then moving to remove his pajama pants. They both worked on the tie and then Donna slipped one hand inside Harvey's boxers and cupped his hot fevered testicles. She could feel his thickened erection.

"I want you inside me. That's where you have always belonged. To me, Harvey. You are mine," Donna said deeply with green eyes blazing with envy at all the women that were fortunate enough to have spent at least one night with Harvey Specter as their lover.

"I do belong to you, Donna. I know that now," Harvey said seeing the green fire and the bruised lips from his kiss. "You are mine now."

Finally all of Harvey's clothing gone and removing Donna's lace panties with one finger, he turned her over and entered her as she welcomed his hot hardness between her legs and into her waiting vagina.

He thrust himself slowly to savor the moment actually being inside the woman he loved. Her vaginal walls surrounded him and began to pulsate around him with her coming orgasm. He slowed down and kissed her from the top of her head to the tops of her breasts where he took one in his mouth and suckled to which he was gratified by Donna pushing it into his mouth and grabbing his shoulders.

 _This is what I've been waiting for all my life but never knew. I've always loved you, Donna. I just was too stupid or scared to recognize it. I need you and want you. Please be mine._

"Oh Harvey. I love you!" _I have missed him. No one has ever given me goosebumps and fire from just looking at me like you have. I will always love you._

"Oh, baby, I'm coming," Donna claimed aloud as her arm reached out to hold onto something as she rode the coming tide with him. She could feel he was as close has she and when he did come he screamed her name and finally lie still within her allowing his semen to slowly drip from her as they lie in Harvey's big bed looking into each other's eyes and knowing that this is where they should have spent the last thirteen years... in bed and being with each other.

"I love you, Donna Paulsen. Don't ever leave me again," Harvey said and kissed her quietly.

Donna just smiled and felt wonderful and finally...at home.


End file.
